The Book I Can't Write.

I can't tell you how many times, people (especially my husband) have strongly encouraged me to write a book. Nice idea in theory. Does it attract me? Maybe for the fame, money and adoration because we all know that I would make the Top Ten Best Sellers List right? .....only if I write about foolishness.

Honestly, the idea frightens me. I've had some say I should write about parenting.

Can't.

Because you know the moment I do, one from my group of pride and joy will prove wrong every theory I have published. I will have egg on my head, a child in the state penitentiary making license plates and my book would be given away from people's yards as kindling. Who am I to even give advice on parenting?? I feel I have no right. If asked, I'll give an opinion, but to write a book? I have been humbled too many times to feel I have a corner on the market of raising children. I may have 9 children, but truthfully, I know parents of less children that have the gift of parenting that needs to be written about. Don't get me wrong, I love parenting but I am imperfect like everybody else....and I am not done. My apologies to my children far outweigh any awards I deserve in this area. You will not see me at Borders signing any parenting books soon.



Others have suggested that I write a book on nutrition and health. Wait, let me put down my deep fried Snickers to explain why this won't ever happen. Nutrition is important to me. In fact, I find this topic spellbinding .....but I am inconsistent at living out my convictions. I talk a good game, but when it comes right down to it, I live by the 80/20 plan. 80% of the time we eat decently and the other 20% of the time you will witness our family eating out of the troughs of Golden Corral, basking in the fries of Mc.D's or picking up the $5 specials at Ceasar's Pizza....only to have our meal be chased with gummy bear Sundaes. Our family blessing for these "20% meals" usually consist not of asking the Lord for nourishment but for protection. Ask me anything about health and nutrition, and I will have a well researched and valid answer. And I truly believe everything I say with a passion. Watch me live it out and you will find me lacking and promising it will get better when I get my act together. The problem is, I lost my act a long time ago and it is currently listed as one of America's Top Ten Most Wanted. Nope. Won't be autographing any books on nutrition either. Nachos and diet coke anyone?

Another suggestion has been to write about my life with having so many children and adopting. Great topic.

Won't do it.

I can't write about this; this story is not even finished yet! And honestly, by the time I do figure things out enough to write about it, I'll be kissing the basements of anthills . So, I don't foresee my life being separated by chapters and told in between numbered pages....unless someone else is crazy enough to write it.

I love writing. It is very cathartic for me. And most of my writing will only be about what I am learning and with what I am struggling. I pray this encourages others and at times brings joy.... but I will never claim to be an expert....not by a long shot. I am still in my own learning curve. I am still grossly imperfect. But I enjoy this life thoroughly knowing that I have been claimed and that I am loved. And if I ever write a book, it will be because the Lord has my back on it. And I will definitely list Him as the co-author.

Really, all that I know to be true 100% of the time could fit under windshield wipers in the size of a tract. And for its reference it would list God's word and the love and sacrifice of Christ. For any success that I could write about, in this amazing life, is due to the love God has liberally lavished on me and the grace and mercy I have not ever deserved. I can not take credit for this, much less write a book and claim the knowledge as my own. Look at the Bible...and you will see the best book ever written. And if you like His book well enough, He will do one better than signing it.....He will sign your heart.