Saturday, September 10, 2011

I know...I know


I know, it's been awhile since I have posted. I have been duly chastised by my loving friends who are waiting for the next tidbit. Why is it so hard to s
it my butt down to post? I really do have a lot to say, but this little 3 inch human being knit within me seems to be calling the shots. I am happy to say that this little one is thriving and there is only one. An ultrasound revealed a healthy little baby wriggling around. This is roughly what the little one should be looking like right now at about 15 weeks gestation.


On the adoption side of things, all is going smoothly but everything just takes so long!! Most of the delays are my fault. For awhile, just looking at fine print made me want to spew. Completing paperwork was beyond what I could get myself to do.....and fine print was what it was all about. I am happy to say that most of this is behind me, and a stack of paperwork has been signed, notarized and sent on to get these little guys home. The Ethiopian courts do not open up again until October 15th due to their rainy season. So hopefully, our dossier will be in the shoot ready to be sent off by then. Timing. It's all in the Lord's timing.

On a different note, but not completely, my sixth born little man child had his birthday this last Sunday and he turned seven. He's the "D" man.



In the mail, he found an envelope addressed to him from a friend of ours. Inside it, he discovered a birthday card and a ten dollar bill. This is a lot of money for a little guy. It was all he had to his name. My husband and I took him out to dinner, just he and us, to celebrate the addition of another year with him. He was in heaven. In the middle of dinner, "D" looked at my husband and said, "Daddy, I have something for you." Steve looked up to see "D" earnestly fishing around in his pant's pocket where he finally pulled out a wadded up ten dollar bill. "Daddy, I want to give you this for the adoption.....all of it." Steve was shocked and finally ushered to tears while telling "D" that he was amazing. "D" stated, "I just want them to come home, Daddy."

I will be honest. Steve has struggled with the financial enormity of this adoption. I don't say this to make him look bad, I say this because this is where the enemy wants us to falter.....over fear that has no grounds. The amount of money that has to flow out will be tremendous and jaw dropping. But, such is the nature of international adoptions. But, it doesn't matter how much we have, there is always worry etched in Steve's soul about having enough money. Many men would be nodding in agreement in reading this. And admittedly, this fear did not start with the adoption but it has been brutally challenged by it.

The question really has to be asked as to why our child had such assurance in handing over all that he had to his Daddy. Yes, he's a child and many children could care less about money but it's more than that. Our son handed over all he had because, at some unknown level to him, he knew that all his needs had been met before acquiring the $10 and they would continue to be met after giving the $10.



Oh, the faith of children. To have trust that not matter what we hand over materially for His name, we would be taken care of and loved....that we would be "caught". To have the trust that our son displayed so beautifully at the dinner table towards his Daddy. He knows his Daddy loves him, he knows that he is protected
and he knows this won't end with the subtraction of all that he has materially......this is why the $10 meant less to him and was easier to relinquish for God's glory. He knew that he would be "caught".

Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?
Matthew 6:25-27 (in Context)


Adoption has made both my husband really evaluate our trust (or lack thereof) in the Lord in comparison to the trust we have instilled in our money. Adoption has put up a mirror to where our priorities really lay....and sometimes the truth of this is downright ugly and shameful. This has been a spiritual battleground for my husband. He has had to confront the fear of radically "going all out" financially for these boys. He has been frustrated with me and at times he sees me like the picture below.....well, truth be told, most people see me like this:




Except, when I jump, I make sure my pants are pulled up....and this poor guy actually looks to have peed himself.

This adoption has made it glaringly clear that one can not worship money and God with the same intensity at once. One needs to choose.

“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Matthew 6:23-25

It has been hard. But I love the lessons this adoption is teaching our family. Pursuing these boys has been so valuable to us.....it is possible that we need to adopt just as badly as our boys need to be adopted. I love that it is further unveiling our eyes to see what God prioritizes and then to perform it with our actions....to see and then do. It is a strange sense of economy that the more you lose for the sake of Christ...the more you gain.

For to me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.
Philippians 1:20-22

Boys, Ephram and Anteneh, just know this. We love you and we are coming to get you.